Writing like C.S. Lewis with Notes

Once there was a girl named Emily, whose Mother loved to go to garden parties. Now, the majority of these parties were very dull, and Emily never enjoyed them very much. However, this particular party ended up being quite interesting, and so this is where I’m going to begin her story.

It was a surprisingly sunny day for England, and Emily would have much preferred to have spent it playing outside in her own garden, running amuck around the trees, pretending to be a princess or a warrior in some far away kingdom, or generally acting in a way that would be considered improper.

“Now darling,” Mother said. “Do not get your dress dirty, and remember to behave yourself while the adults are talking.”

Emily said nothing, because she was very cross to have her day wasted by a boring garden party.

They walked together through the back gate of some rich woman’s city house and into a small but lush garden. It was very beautiful, with roses blooming in all different colours, and lavender filling the air with heavy, sleepy scents. Tables had been laid out with little finger sandwiches and pots of tea for the adults to enjoy. Many of them were already milling around wearing pale shades that matched the blossoms that surrounded them, picking at the delicious food and making polite conversation. Even the sleepy willow tree in one corner that stood in front of an ivy-covered wall seemed to blossom with colour. It would be a very lovely place to spend an afternoon, Emily thought, if she had been allowed to do as she pleased there.

It was not long before a woman came up to Emily’s Mother, with a small boy in tow. The adults greeted each other with gentle hugs and meaningless pleasantries, while the children looked each other over cautiously. They could both tell that, as the only two youngsters at the party, they were going to be lumped together and expected to entertain each other for multiple hours.

“Emily, this is Hubert,” Emily’s Mother said. “You can play with him while Mummy chats with the adults, all right?”

Emily nodded quietly, knowing fully well what was expected of her at these sort of events.

The two children were given directions to the kid’s table, where juices and cookies would be waiting for them, and left to their own devices. They began walking in silence towards the back of the garden, sullenly accepting their fate to be either bored or in trouble for the rest of the afternoon.

For my performance task I chose the author C.S. Lewis, because I really admire the way in which he can tell a story in simplistic yet elegant terms. Reading through his The Chronicles of Narnia series, I tried to take notice of some particular stylistic things he did and apply them into my own short story. First off, I noticed that he writes in a very novice fashion, over-explaining and “telling” many things, breaking the fourth wall, and using many run-on sentences. While in some works this might make the writing unbearable to read, for C.S. Lewis it simply adds idyllic charm, and completes his fairy-tale air. He also has a tendency to only tell his exposition through addressing the audience directly or by having another character tell the others exposition through stories. Again,  while these methods may be seen as amateur, he makes them work in a fun and smooth-flowing way. As for actual content, he prefers to use children and talking animals as the protagonists,  imbedding christian symbolism in the stories, and having intricate fantasy settings he describes in heavy detail. The end product is a potent fairy tale that will be remembered through one’s entire lifetime. 

I started the story off with a very classic “Once there was…”. C.S. Lewis does this classic fairytale start with almost every single one of his books:

“This is a story about something that happened long ago when your grandfather was a child.” -The Magician’s Nephew
“Once there were four children whose names were Peter, Susan, Edmund and Lucy”
- The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe
“This is the story of an adventure that happened in Narnia and Calormen…”
- The Horse and His Boy
“Once there were four children whose names were Peter, Susan, Edmund and Lucy, and it has been told in another book…”
-Prince Caspian
“There was a boy called Eustace Clarence, and he almost deserved it.”
- The Voyage of the Dawn Treader
While these beginnings may seem to some to be almost immature and simplistic, I think it is very near the perfect way to start a story. It throws the reader right in, with no lollygagging or confusion about the topic idea or characters that are about to be portrayed.

Here, I address the reader directly and specifically state that this is a story. C.S. Lewis also did this multiple times throughout his books:

“I hope you all won’t lose interest in Jill for the rest of the book…”

- The Silver Chair

“I hope no one who reads this book has been quite as miserable as Susan and Lucy were that night…” -The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe

I found this very interesting, because while you may think statements like these would alienate the reader they always served to make me feel closer to the story and its protagonists. 

Here I address Emily’s mother as simply Mother. I have capitalized it because it will be her official name for the story. C.S.Lewis does not place very much importance on adults, especially in his earlier books; all his protagonists are under twenty, and the majority are under twelve. The mother in this story mainly serves as a vessel to get Emily to the garden party, where I would have the real plot take place.

This sentence here is very telling, and even uses “because” as a conjunction. However, C.S. Lewis frequently used sentences like this while explaining the emotions and reasons for the actions of the characters.

“Because the game of hide and seek was still going on, it took Edmund and Lucy quite some time to find the others.” -The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe

I think that while this may be an immature way of writing, it is very “of the style” of C.S. Lewis, and makes my writing look and sound more like his.

Throughout his books, C.S. Lewis describes many different fantasy settings. I noticed that he usually describes these in full and intricate detail, leaving almost nothing to the imagination and painting a full picture the reader can easily see in their head. For example, here is how he described an abandoned treasure room:

“For now all knew that it was indeed the ancient treasure chamber of Cair Paraval where they had once reigned as kings and queens of Narnia. There was a kind of path up the middle (as in might be in a greenhouse), and along each side at intervals stood rich suits of armour, like knights guarding the treasures. In between the suits of armour, and on each side of the path,were shelves covered in precious things - necklaces and arm rings and finger rings and golden bowls and dishes and long tusks of ivory, brooches and coronets and chains of gold, and heaps of unset stones lying piled anyhow as if they were marbles or potatoes - diamonds, rubies, carbuncles, emeralds, topazes, and amethysts. Under the shelves stood great chests of oak strengthened with iron bars and heavily padlocked. And it was bitterly cold, and so still that they could hear themselves breathing, and the treasures were so covered in dust that unless they had realized where they were and remembered most of the things, they would have hardly have known they were treasures. There was something sad and a little frightening about the place, because it all seemed so forsaken and long ago. That was why nobody said anything for at least a minute.”
-Prince Caspian
As you can see, his style was very detailed and expressive, and I tried to transfer those factors into my own writing. However, he also has a tendency to let his sentences run on a bit, using multiple commas within one and not ending it until he has communicated multiple points. I didn’t think this factor seemed very professional or add charm,  and so I decided to leave it out.

Frequently C.S. Lewis shows that he has access to multiple character’s thoughts, and refers many times to the Penvensie children as a group with group thoughts. For example:
“They were all wondering what to do next, when Lucy said…”
-The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe.
“…Everyone was feeling that the holidays were really over and everyone felt their term-time feelings begin again…” -Prince Caspian

I liked the way this gave the groups of people a sense of cohesiveness, and showed the reader the feelings an environment gave off. I tried to incorporate this in these two paragraphs by showing two different groups and their collective actions and thoughts.